It’s Halloween season! With that said, I would like to share with you the most f****d up thing I have seen in a long time. Considering I spend more time looking up weird stuff on the internet than the average person, that says a lot.

Everyone who knows me is well aware of my rational fear of spiders. Yes, it’s rational. A fear of clowns is irrational, because clowns are supposed to be good and bring happiness. Spiders, on the other hand, are the spawn of Satan. That is why we see fake spiders for decoration during this time of year and not at circuses and birthday parties. It’s science.

Anyway, there is a website called ThailandUnique.com, and holy shit! Sections of the website include Edible Insects, Insect Powder, Canned Bugs, Bug Candy, Bulk Wholesale Insects, Unique Food & Drink and Blog.

The last two categories crack me up. “Unique” food and drink? Because insect powder and bug candy isn’t unique enough? As for blogs…well…here’s one headline: “Why TV programs don’t always do edible insects justice.” Finally, someone broke the ice on that topic!

For $15.99, you can have this:

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOPE!

Generally speaking, drinking alcohol will help you get over your fears temporarily. Liquid courage, they call it. However, I think this product will cancel each other out:

For the person on a budget, a bag of female katydids – or “coneheads” – will only set you back $1.50 (plus shipping/handling):

And for the person who truly gives zero fucks, dine on some giant hornet larvae:

It’s cool, they’re honey roasted!

If you ever thought you could survive the apocalypse or a plane crash in a remote area and have to survive off the land, put yourself to the test. Me? I’ve already accepted imminent death.